kidsBack home and trying to land after being away for a week attending a seminar on Emotional Intelligence and Diversity in Portland, Oregon. Emotional Intelligence resumes to one simple answer “there is more than one right answer”. Depending on our schemas, the story we tell ourselves is how we choose to see the world and deal with different situations.

How many times we find ourselves judging people for what they say, do or they choose to live life. How about looking at us first and understanding that the only reason why it seem so awkward is because it doesn’t fit our box. The only reason we judge is because it doesn’t validate our choices in life.

My two sons fight all the time about what to watch on TV, my older son obviously likes more “Cool” cartoons {if there is such a thing} my younger prefers more adventurer, lots of animals and songs {magical}, but because these choices do not fit Andres’s {older} story, he automatically labels them as “too childish”. His friends at school have created this story in his head. You must be cool in order to survive in this world. Thank God I’m not part of the story or else he would of found a way to get rid of me along time ago, or maybe he’s planning on it. He judges his little brother choices instead of accepting them, because behind his story there is a range of emotions. The point is that none of this is real. He has created his own story and based on it and he chooses not to accept differences because of fear of being embarrassed, rejected or inferior to his classmates.

So how do we detach from those feelings? First we need to know what is inside our box? What are the experiences shaping our ideas about dealing with differences?

List some events in your life that had a formative experience and created an impact. Name your feelings towards it.

Register the response in your mind and the next time you are too quick to judge, re-frame and scan for the possibility that “There is more than one story in that particular situation”

Love the world and its diversity.

On the picture: Andres and Sebastian (being a clown…) on a video conference during my stay in Portland.